Are you afraid you'll hurt the people you care about if you say NO to them?
Can you set limits when employees neglect their responsibilities? How about with your boss?
When friends ask you to do something you don't want to do, do you invent an elaborate excuse?
Do you have a hard time saying NO to an invitation even when you're completely exhausted?
Do you have trouble even practicing the sentence "No, Mom, I just can't make it home this holiday"?
If any of these scenarios sound familiar, keep reading - you need this book...
No is a very simple word -- two letters, one syllable. Yet many women have a hard time saying it without feeling anxious or guilty. In My Answer Is NO...If That's Okay with You, award-winning psychiatrist and author Dr. Nanette Gartrell takes a fresh look at why even the most powerful, accomplished, and successful women find it difficult to say no and offers a revolutionary approach to setting limits without jeopardizing important relationships.
Today women are bombarded with messages like "put yourself first" and "stop being a people-pleaser." But this sort of advice is useless to women who value the caring and generosity that prompt them to say yes in the first place. Through personal interviews with a diverse group of talented women, including CEOs, celebrities, physicians, and public officials, Dr. Gartrell shows that women's reluctance to say no stems from valuable traits that they should embrace, such as empathy, sensitivity, and thoughtfulness. With humor and wisdom, Dr. Gartrell reaffirms the psychological importance of compassion and feeling connected, which can often lead a woman to say yes rather than no in order to preserve a relationship or spare someone's feelings. Through entertaining anecdotes and insights from her years of clinical practice, Dr. Gartrell teaches women to honor their best instincts while still maintaining boundaries. My Answer Is NO...If That's Okay with You offers creative, practical ways to transform an automatic or reluctant yes into a healthy, respectful no -- and still feel good about it.
Customer Reviews:
Avg. Customer Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Excellent book!:
As a psychologist, I think that Dr. Gartrell has done an impressive job of writing a book that has equal applicability to readers who are mental health professionals, readers who have never delved into psychology at all, and anyone else in between. No mean feat! It's an overall good read, and some sections are very poignant, others very funny. I think this book will do a lot of good for a wide variety of readers.
Can't say no to this book:
"No" is one of the best self-help books I've read in quite awhile. I would recommend the book to male friends if it weren't so obviously targeted to women. Most people would consider me above-average assertive, but I found many ideas immensely helpful. For example, I believe many of us could relate to the challenge of saying no to friends. We've all participated in stale rituals and over the years I've said "yes" to invitations I later regretted. Perhaps the best part of this book is the section... more info
Immediately Applicable:
As is typical of many women, saying no is something that I just cannot seem to do routinely. It has caused me more problems than my past problems with alcohol. Sober 22 years, I still have a tough time saying the simple word "no." Dr. Gartrell's book is practical and clear. That is what I need. I immediately put it into practice. I am a very fast reader and work in a tough business. The book works for me. I needed help in a fast and sure way. Yes, I appreciate the quotes from women that are very important... more info
I'm not so wimpy afterall:
For years (all of my adult life) I've thought my difficulty saying "NO" was a serious psychological flaw of character. Everyone else-- or so it seemed to me-- was establishing strong, tidy boundaries about personal responsibilities. No one seemed to have the same serious problem I do, i.e., saying "NO" when my own interests are overlooked and completely screwed. Now here is Danielle Steele telling me she has the same problem! HELLO!
The best part of the book is that Dr. Gartrell tells me it's because... more info
